


The First Step Forward

by kg1507



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Blood and Injury, Comfort, Female Friendship, Friendship, Gen, Hurt, Lena Luthor Knows Kara Danvers Is Supergirl, One Shot, Other, POV Lena Luthor, SuperCorp
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-21
Updated: 2020-01-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:01:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22356064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kg1507/pseuds/kg1507
Summary: Kara, Lena, and a Truth Seeker..............................................................................Her fingers twitch as she unscrews the lid of the container in her hands, and when she reaches inside, the unmistakable octopus-like form of a Truth Seeker latches to her arm, its tentacles slowly climbing higher and higher until she is covered in the alien up to her shoulder. Kara looks at Lena once the creature stills."I want to tell you something."
Relationships: Kara Danvers & Lena Luthor, Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 24
Kudos: 946





	The First Step Forward

**Author's Note:**

> I read a tumblr post on @lena-luthor about this scenario and... today was a slow work day and this is what I have to show for it.

Lena doesn't know what makes her open the door. Maybe she does it because of an inherent habit that is proving to be more and more difficult to break, regardless of whether she consciously wants to let Kara in or not. Her heart still aches, that much hasn't changed, but the universe ended and was reborn from the ashes, and her life was spared with all of her memories untouched and intact. She wishes she could've chosen otherwise. What a relief it would have been, to go back to being naive and foolish, and to have the chance to feel something other than this bleak emptiness.

Kara looks nervous as she walks inside the apartment; she carries a small tube-like container in her arms, cradling it close. Her cape briefly flutters in the breeze before Lena closes the balcony off, the sounds of the city fade and there is a stark silence as each of them wait for the other to speak. As Kara takes a shaky breath, Lena is frustrated to find that her eyes are already starting to water. She holds her gaze, unblinking, determined not to be the one who looks away first.

Kara smiles sadly. “I wasn’t sure if you would let me in.” She looks exhausted. Saving the multiverse will do that, Lena supposes.

Lena sighs, a soft sound almost inaudible to anyone’s ears but Kara’s. “To be honest, I don’t really know why I am.” She shifts from one foot to the other, clears her throat. “I guess I owe you one conversation in thanks for saving all of reality.”

Kara nods silently, and Lena can tell she's nervous. Her fingers twitch as she unscrews the lid of the container in her hands, and when she reaches inside, the unmistakable octopus-like form of a Truth Seeker latches to her arm, its tentacles slowly climbing higher and higher until she is covered in the alien up to her shoulder. Kara looks at Lena once the creature stills.

"I want to tell you something."

Lena’s throat is dry as she looks at the alien on Kara’s arm. She remembers Lillian baring all under the same creature’s influence, hears her voice saying that she loves her. Lena's throat tightens as she shakes her head. “No, whatever it is you want to say, it won’t change anything. For all I know, Kryptonians are immune to the Truth Seeker and this is just you trying to play on my emotions.”

She expects to see Kara’s face fall in defeat, expects her to be caught off guard at her ruse being revealed, but Kara remains steady. She nods her head in reply, reaching into the container once more with her free hand. She pulls out a palm-sized metal box, her fingers shaking. She swallows heavily, but her voice does not tremble.

“I had a feeling you were going to say that. I’m  _ not  _ immune to the Truth Seeker, but you don’t trust me to be honest with you. You don’t know for sure if I’m invulnerable or not, but you do know what would  _ make  _ me vulnerable.” She flips the latch open, revealing a substantially-sized shard of green kryptonite within. The effect on Kara is instantaneous - Lena watches as her veins absorb the radiation inside the rock, Kara’s face illuminates with a sickly green glow and she grimaces in pain, but she doesn’t stop there. Using the hand that harbors the Truth Seeker, Kara picks up the kryptonite, clutching it in her fingers. The metal box falls to the floor with a heavy thud. She lifts her other hand and turns her palm upwards, and with one quick motion that makes Lena flinch, she slices her skin open to prove the kryptonite’s validity. Lena stares as the blood begins to pool in Kara’s outstretched hand.

Kara inhales sharply as her wound begins to sting. “You know that exposure to kryptonite makes me vulnerable to everything that a human would be. So now, you can believe that I’m telling the truth.” She holds the kryptonite tightly in her bloody hand, meeting Lena’s horrified eyes. The Truth Seeker tightens its grip as she opens her mouth to speak.

“Lena, I know you hate me, and I completely understand why. I broke your trust, and I will live with that mistake for the rest of my life. I understand that you don’t want me in your life anymore, and if you still feel that way after this is over, then… then I’ll accept it. I’ll leave you alone, I swear I will, but I can't walk away until I've done everything in my power to try to make this right - not for my sake, or to heal my own guilt, but for  _ you _ .” She pauses and a tear rolls down her cheek as she takes a step forward. Her voice is desperate and earnest.

“I want you to know how seriously I’m taking the pain I caused you, and how much I want to own up to the responsibility of it. Everything I said at the Pulitzer ceremony was true - I was afraid of telling you who I am, not because I never trusted you, but because I was terrified of the possibility of losing you as a result of my lies. I know it was wrong of me to divide our friendship between both of my identities, it was inexcusable and I will never forgive myself for it." Tears flow freely down Kara's cheeks now, but her voice remains strong and clear.

"I'm not here to keep telling you how sorry I am, because no amount of apologizing will ever make up for the ways I've hurt you. And I'm not here to beg for your forgiveness."

"Then why  _ are _ you here?" Lena blurts out. Her eyes dart from the Truth Seeker to the kryptonite, aware that every second that passes means that Kara will continue to experience the worst kind of physical pain that is possible for her to feel, and that she was doing it of her own will. “This could kill you, you know it can, why are you risking that?”

The Truth Seeker tightens around Kara’s arm. She tilts her head slightly and although her eyes continue to well with emotion, there is no hesitation in her voice.

"Because, Lena, despite all the pain I've caused, despite what my choices have made you believe, you deserve to know how much I've always believed in you, and how important you are to me. You deserve to know, without a doubt, that you are and  _ always _ have been my best friend, and I love you. That was never part of the lie."

Lena feels her own tears tumble down her face and she has to look down, unable to meet Kara's eyes. She can track the path each droplet takes as they fall to the floor one by one. It takes everything she has not to break down, even though it wouldn't be the first time she had openly wept in Kara's presence. She doesn't know what to say - her instincts tell her to run, shut Kara out and protect herself from the possibility of more heartbreak. It was why she had chosen to work with Lex, after all - there was safety in the knowledge that he would turn on her eventually. She could prepare for the inevitable, but it was the unknown that terrified her to her core.

For the first time in months, Lena believes her. She wishes she could have more faith in Kara without a Truth Seeker attached to her skin, but Lena couldn't ignore or dismiss the lengths Kara had gone to in order to prove herself. And truth be told, Lena knew she needed Kara's help for what was coming.

Lena wiped one cheek and took a step forward, bending down to pick up the lead box from the floor. She extended one hand towards Kara once she straightened up again, but the hand Lena reached for was not the one that clutched the bloody kryptonite.

The Truth Seeker slid down Kara's arm until it rested in the palm of her hand, lifting two tentacles; they floated in the air, twitching lazily for something to grasp onto. Lena expected something cold and slimy, like a worm or some sea creature from the deep, but was surprised to find that the little alien's touch was actually quite warm, the texture smooth as human skin. It loosely wound itself around the first three fingers of her left hand and settled. She waited for it to leave Kara's outstretched hand and transfer entirely to her own, but it would go no further. Its body became a fragile bridge, as delicate as the thin tentacles that connected them to each other.

Lena took a shaky breath, feeling the Truth Seeker react instantly to the emotional turbulence that lived inside her. She expected it to grip her painfully in response, but after a brief moment of tenseness, the alien squeezed gently in what felt like something strongly resembling a hug.

Instantly, Lena was compelled to say nothing but what was true. More so, she  _ wanted _ to say it. She could feel something else happening inside her as well - she was filled with images of Hope, of her plans for Non Nocere, and she saw now how flawed it all was, how misguided and wrong she had been. She could see clearly for the first time how close she had come to taking away all of mankind's free will and felt a shame so deep that it was like someone had dragged a knife across her abdomen. As she tried to recover, Lena came to a shocking realization - the Truth Seeker didn't just force you to reveal your truth to others, it also had the ability to reveal the truth  _ to you. _

Lena tried to choke back a sob, but the longer she remained attached to the Truth Seeker, the harder it was for her to keep her emotions from bursting out. She met Kara's hesitantly hopeful eyes.

"I'm scared to trust you again," Lena said softly. "It's going to take a lot of time for me to feel comfortable around you again, and I don't know if things will ever be the same between us." She lifted her head a little and nodded in resolve. "But I'm scared of Lex even more, and he's planning something that is bigger than anything he's ever tried to do in the past, and I need help stopping him." At Kara's confused look, she added, "I was never going to help him achieve anything - but it's easier to know what he's up to if he thinks I'm on his side."

Kara's eyes were starting to droop and her legs quivered - the kryptonite exposure was getting worse, and she swayed precariously in place, trying to remain conscious. Lena popped the latch open and held the box forward, letting Kara drop the bloody rock inside with a groan of discomfort. Lena snapped it shut and Kara breathed a harsh sigh of relief as her strength returned. Lena watched, fascinated, as the gash in her hand wove itself back together, completely devoid of any lingering mark or scar.

Once she had recovered, Kara looked back to Lena, her facial features torn between relief and unease. After a moment of silence, she spoke quietly, "I miss you."

Lena fought back a lump in her throat. She wanted to tell her that they were a long way off from being anything close to friends again, that she shouldn't get her hopes up about what the future held for them. She intended to say these things, but when she opened her mouth to reply, Lena said instead,

"I miss you, too."

The Truth Seeker still touches both women, its grip firm and unyielding. There is a lot of work still to be done, more hurdles and bumps in the road that need to be dealt with, but this is a step in the right direction.

Lena didn’t know why she let Kara in, why she opened the door - but now she understands. The door had never really closed.


End file.
